Save a Horse, Ride a Captain sequel snippets

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This animation is based on a fanfic/podfic of the same name. You can find the original text on Ao3. There were a few lines added to the story in the audio that were not in the original text; the transcript of these additions can be found at the podfic post.

Credits

Written by galwednesday.

Read by

Animated by irrationalpie.

Made using these helpers and source code available on Github courtesy of irrationalpie, drawing heavily from this repository, courtesy of oakleaf.

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Save a Horse, Ride a Captain sequel snippets
Save a Horse, Ride a Captain sequel snippets
written by galwednesday
read by irrationalpie, secrestsofluftnarp, and pandamug
Relationship: Steve Rogers/Bucky Barnes
Typing: spy-drone-289 Rhodes Tony Stark, probably Stark Wilson Natasha JARVIS
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StarkText
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  / ___// /_____ ______/ /_/_  __/__  _  __/ /_
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 ___/ / /_/ /_/ / /  / ,<  / / /  __/>  </ /_  
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> Initiating StarkTech spy drone 'spy-drone-289'.
> Tracking target ‘Steve Rogers' a.k.a. ‘Capsicle'
spy-drone-289
"You're really warm," Bucky slurred. He tucked his chin into the crook of Steve's shoulder, his stubble scraping gently against Steve's neck, and Steve almost dropped him.
spy-drone-289
"How much further?" Steve said desperately. Bucky wasn't heavy, but carrying the warm, lax weight of him, and feeling the hot rush of Bucky's breath over his jaw with every exhale, was slowly filling Steve's body with a light, fizzy happiness that Steve felt instinctively couldn't be an appropriate reaction to seeing a drunk stranger home. He felt like a shook-up soda bottle.
spy-drone-289
"Dunno," Bucky said cheerfully. "Hey, how much can you bench press? How much does a rhinoceros weigh? Is a rhinoceros bigger than a moose?"
spy-drone-289
"Probably. Stand up for a second, pal, I need to check something in your wallet."
spy-drone-289
"Okay."
spy-drone-289
Bucky hummed a little, apparently entirely unconcerned, while Steve propped him up against a wall and rifled through his pockets. For a worrying second it looked like Bucky's wallet might be in his skinny jeans, and Steve wasn't going to go fishing around in those pockets, Bucky's pants were tight enough that it would count as what Steve's Ma used to call getting fresh , but eventually Steve found a wallet in Bucky's inner jacket pocket. Steve pulled out Bucky's ID card and checked his address.
spy-drone-289
"All right, it's just a little further. Hop on up."
spy-drone-289
Bucky made an adorable little "hup hup" noise while Steve boosted him back up.
spy-drone-289
"God damn it, Tony, not again!"
> *crunch*
> Connection with ‘spy-drone-289' lost
Tony Stark, probably
What the fuck. Was my spy drone trying to audition as a romance writer? What is this fizzy happiness business?!
Typing: spy-drone-289 Rhodes Tony Stark, probably Stark Wilson Natasha JARVIS
>> 
Vengeance Bros
Stark
JARVIS
Stark
ORDER CHAMPAGNE
Stark
JUST LIKE
Stark
A HUNDRED CASES OF CHAMPAGNE
Stark
BUY A VINYARD
Rhodes
Belay that, JARVIS.
JARVIS
Thank you, Colonel Rhodes.
Stark
Spoilsports
Stark
We need CHAMPAGNE
Stark
Cap's getting LAID
Rhodes
Seriously?
Wilson
no
Wilson
but he did have an actual conversational exchange with another human that didn't involve mortal peril on either side
Wilson
and they were making some serious calf eyes at each other
Stark
Yeah fine no he's not
Stark
Mr. Piggy-back was way too drunk for Steve to do anything but gallantly escort him to his door
Stark
But he TALKED to someone
Stark
To a BOY
Stark
A CUTE BOY
Stark
Our baby's growing up
Wilson
he didn't just talk to him, he LEFT THE BAR with him
Rhodes
Woah. Steve went home with someone?
Wilson
the guy told Steve he had a "good face"
Wilson
and Steve didn't even go hide in the bathroom
Rhodes
Was mind control involved?
Rhodes
Maybe some kind of pheromone spray?
Stark
Don't be ridiculous
Stark
My watch tests for airborn toxins every 14 seconds
Stark
Plus I had JARVIS run a background check on him the second they left
Stark
The guy's a legit Army Sergeant
Stark
And a damn good sniper
Stark
Like Clint good
Stark
Like "his marksmanship scores are classified" good
Rhodes
Tony.
Rhodes
Please stop telling me when you hack the military.
Stark
It would be faster to tell you when I DON'T hack the military
Stark
Like last Tuesday
Stark
I didn't hack the military even a little bit
Wilson
ANYWAY
Wilson
Steve was all blushy and flustered
Wilson
It was adorable
Rhodes
Please tell me you have video.
Natasha
<<embedded video: fire_hydrant_steve.mp4>>
Rhodes
Thank you, Natasha.
Natasha
🌼💐🌸🌺🌹🌻🌷💮🥀
Wilson
I have real hopes
Wilson
Like actual grounded in reality hopes
Wilson
That he will get this guy's number
Wilson
And have one
Wilson
Normal
Wilson
Friend
Stark
I thought that was your job
Wilson
I can fly, dude
Wilson
I'm only normal by you-people standards
Wilson
Because your lives are completely ridiculous
Wilson
And my life is slightly less batshit
Wilson
Slightly
Typing: spy-drone-289 Rhodes Tony Stark, probably Stark Wilson Natasha JARVIS
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